Ever notice that the internal dialogue you’re listening to isn’t singing a pretty tune? We talk to ourselves all day long –and in those times that we pay attention, what are we saying? Sometimes we need a firm solid reminder that we are human and are flawed –which in and of its self, is beautiful. Yesterday I watched a good friend of mine as she dealt with some extraordinary circumstances beyond what I’ve ever experienced. She vocalized a few of the thoughts in her head –and I couldn’t help but notice how hard she was on herself. It made me step back:
We need to be kinder to ourselves.
Often we find our “ah-ha” moments (as Opra calls them) as something that kicks our butts into shape, and may inspire a couple of days of great dieting, or extending service, or house cleaning, etc. This time it was much more of an awakening to the fact that my little “ah-ha” moments are fleeting, yet this concept needs to become permanent. I believe that we are given our trials as a way to better ourselves. Many would see the end-result (i.e. coming out on-top) as the important goal. I’m starting to see it differently; I believe that allowing ourselves to feel the moments of sorrow, or anger, or joy and being forgiving with our own frailty is what is going to make our lives more meaningful, and ultimately create a stronger person inside. I’m not necessarily here to “endure to the end” so to speak –as some amazing reward awaits me. If I can love myself and be completely satisfied with who I am as a woman and individual, then all the end result will take care of itself.
Friday, May 30, 2008
...becoming...
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Preschool Graduation
Had to put a blurb in about Preschool Graduation. Miss Lynn and Miss Kristie are some of the most wonderful teachers I've ever met. I'll tell you what, I've never seen anyone get a bigger kick out of Ella than Miss Lynn! Ella talks about her all the time -and has even said that she wants to be a teacher like Miss Lynn someday. :)
Ella next to Logan. This picture makes me giggle.
Ella wins the award for "Little Miss Optimist" -she was ALWAYS excited about what they were going to do for the day. I must be doing something right!
Ella with Miss Lynn!
Ella is 4!!
We then went home and did some cooking! I'll tell you what, I brought my A-GAME on these divine little drops of heaven (butterscotch oatmeal cookies), and the banana bread wasn't too shabby either! I mentioned earlier that I can bake like a champ!
Ooo, she's losin' it....
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Baaad night
Mia came down with a runny nose yesterday -which isn't a big deal. Well, I gave her some medication after her bath and put her right to bed. About an hour later, she was having a really hard time breathing, and was scared & crying. Poor little baby! Lance and I decided we'd take her into te ER (Insta care was closed). She had a chest x-ray, which is AWFUL. They put her in this plexi-vice spiel, and I had to stand there and hold her little hands up. She screamed and screamed -her little face was bright red. Tears and snot ran down her face, but I handled it okay... till she opened her eyes. She didn't taken them off of mine as she screamed for the reamainder of her time there, and I just lost it. I feel awful having her watch me with tears streaming down my face, but for any mom who has done this with their kid -they understand the heartbreak. :( They said that her lungs are consistent with viral rather than bacterial illness -so that's good. We got good drugs and they observed her for a while. I got to bed after 1 AM. Needless to say, as my alarm was set for 4:30 for work, I decided not to go. Ella is getting sick too, so it's a 2-fer. Good times. A big shout-out to the babes (Noah and Lily) we hung out with this weekend. Hope you stay healthy!!!
Friday, May 23, 2008
It's so me, it's scary.
You Are An ENFJ |
 The Giver You strive to maintain harmony in relationships, and usually succeed. Articulate and enthusiastic, you are good at making personal connections. Sometimes you idealize relationships too much - and end up being let down. You find the most energy and comfort in social situations ... where you shine. In love, you are very protective and supporting. However, you do need to "feel special" - and it's quite easy for you to get jealous. At work, you are a natural leader. You can help people discover their greatest potential. You would make a good writer, human resources director, or psychologist. How you see yourself: Trusting, idealistic, and expressive When other people don't get you, they see you as: Bossy, inappropriate, and loud |
I love......
I was reading my friend Joni's blog the other day and was inspired to jot down a few things I love -for the sake of my girls who will (I'm sure) need to know this someday.
*I love the sound of my children laughing. When they laugh, both of them get the "half moon" eyes that I have, and the look on their faces is priceless.
*I love chilling outside on a summer evening with my family. Nearly ever weekend we'll get the ole' classic rock tunes rolling and make a dutch oven with Ella zooming in and out of the house -and me freaking out about letting the flies in... Some of our best conversations happen here.
*I love homey scents -like cinnamon and apple. I always like my home to smell yummy and inviting. ...It makes people feel more welcome.
*On that note, I love being the "hostess" -not to a crazy degree like Monica from "Friends", but I love having people over and taking care of them.
*I love fresh clean laundry.
*I love the smell of my baby after her bath when she rubs her eyes and looks at me with so much wonder as I sing her a song or two before bed.
*I love Super Mario Cart -and the fact that Ella does too. Great bonding. *Great entertainment in crappy weather! :)
*I love going to the Farmer's Market on Saturday mornings -just to get out of the house, and look at fun creative things that others come up with.
*I love Christmas and all of the planning and wrapping and home-made card making, and cooking, and anticipation -it's intoxicating.
*I love shopping for pretty things for me (most mom's don't admit this) -like purses or make-up or a new pair of swanky sunglasses.
*I love watching Ella do the "wiggle-waggle dance" -that NEVER gets old.
*I love a good conversation with a friend that leaves me inspired to be better.
*I love becoming a full-on DIVA in my car when a good tune rolls out.
*I love going to sleep on nights that my alarm clock isn't going to wake me up the next morning.
I suppose I could go on for a LONG time, as more and more things come to my mind. I don't understand how someone can go through life without passion for what inspires them. I sincerely LOVE these things -and many more. I feel deeply, and wouldn't want to change that. I guess I am simply here to take in the experience, because I know how irreplaceable and fragile it all is.
Thursday, May 22, 2008
7 crazy facts about me
I have been tagged by Heidi -my ole' Panguitch Elementary School friend. Bless her heart -she turned out as amazing as I knew she would!
1.) I can bake and not cook. Lance can tell you all about how I can make some fabulous cookies -even yummy banana bread or raspberry buckle, but not so much on the dinners. I have no creativity in this area.
2.) I have a sexy phone voice (or so I've been told...). I've done years of customer service/ sales & training folks which has developed a fantastic sexy phone voice. Hope you don't get me on the line -I'll sell you something. :)
3.) My dad was born in the Grand Canyon, Grandmother married in Sequoia National Park, I have actually a LOT of family history with national parks. We reunion in one every other year.
4.) I like to teach Ella big words so that I feel like a smart mom. She'll surprise you with a sentence like "acutally, that's quite impressive".
5.) I have issues with folks who pronounce the word nuclear as "nucular" (Prez Bush for one!). I am also not a huge fan of Craig T. Nelson -and my family knows this is a sensitive spot.
6.) I haven't voted since I was 18, yet, am quite politically involved. Shamey!
7.) I am the queen of justification. You need help getting over something? Come chat with me.
Now I tag you! Joni, Kate, & Heather!
1. On your post, link back to the person who tagged you - that would be me, in this case.
2. Post your assignment on your blog - seven weird or random facts.
3. Post these rules on your blog.
4. Post links to the bloggers that you will be tagging.
5. Go to those blogs and give them a comment on their blog to let them know that you have tagged them.
Monday, May 19, 2008
Friday, May 16, 2008
The return of Ugly Frog
As these things go, kids toys tend to come and disappear. Ella can tell you all about the "green monster" who takes her toys that she doesn't pick up... Is this an effective method? No. However, I have been know to take a trash bag and sort through her toys and get rid of the ones I can't stand on more than one occasion. *The KEY is to get rid of the bag, because it's like Christmas on one side for the child who realized she missed the toys HOWEVER she becomes a bit cheesed that they were missing in the first place... Puts you in an uncomfortable position -but I digress.
So yesterday we get home from grocery shopping at Walmart (Lord give me strength) and I was thirsty. I was zooming in and out of the garage grabbing groceries out of the car trunk -and I spotted my stash of Minute Maid Light Raspberry Passion (YUM) and reached in for a can. Well, when you're feeling for cans in a semi-dark garage, you don't want to feel something SQUISHY!! I pulled my hand out VERY quickly as I screeched, dropping the can on the ground, thinking something DEAD has landed on my Minute Maid Light Raspberry Passion stash -NO BUENO! I peer in, expecting to see a corpse, but no, it's worse. It's Ugly Frog. This wretched toy has been my nemesis from day one, and now it's out to take my Minute Maid Light Raspberry Passion stash down too? I don't think so. I was so skeeved that it was actually still hard to open the can -but my thirst won. Ugly frog still resides in this box in my garage (Ella is quite creative when it comes to stashing things from the green monster). I don't think I can reach in for another can of Minute Maid Light Raspberry Passion, HOWEVER, next time the green monster strikes, the whole box goes down, baybee. Since we got Ugly Frog back 2x during our Sam's Club excursion, and since he has taken over my Minute Maid Light Raspberry Passion stash, OKAY, Ugly Frog -3, Rebecca -0, but these are battles. I SHALL WIN THE WAR!!!!
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Slug Mom
