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Friday, February 20, 2009

thoughts

Some days there is something inside of me that wants to scream and tear away from my life for just a few moments. Sometimes the regrets about terrible decisions I’ve made in my life become overwhelming and I almost grieve a loss of something I never had. In a way, my heart is broken from so much of the wrong influence I’ve let in. In some ways, the perspective I have on life and whatever judgment I unconsciously put on others and myself becomes meaningless.


I have the sincerest faith in the profound meaning of one life here on earth –and the unexplainable effect it can have on others –the butterfly-effect, if you will. I think that when it comes down to it, it’s hard for someone to come to terms with the reality of their own significance, and insignificance at the same time. The balance within me doesn’t come from any doctrine, or any one particular influence. I believe that it comes from the compilation of my experience both in this life, and whatever it was in the previous life that led me to be placed here: in this date and time. I believe that from the knowledge gained –from the lessons learned – from the pieces kept in my heart; this is what makes me who I am, and okay with what I have become.